Interesting research has been conducted on the power of language in forming our perspective. In experiments, German-speaking and English speaking participants were shown video clips and then asked to describe the scenes. German speakers tended to look at the event as a whole, describing the possible goal of people’s actions, while English speakers tended to zoom in on the event and describe only the action. A German speaker might say “a woman is walking toward the supermarket”, while an English speaker would simply say “a woman is walking”.

When bilingual speakers were tested, their perspectives switched based on the language context they were given the task. Experiments were conducted across various languages, with bilingual speakers, showing distinct changes in how they processed events or how they expressed emotions, depending on which language they were operating in.

Participants are self-reported that they felt like a different person when using different languages. The researchers concluded that the language we speak can significantly affect our perspective and the way we think.
Linguistic relativity is the concept that the language we use and the words we speak provide feedback to our thinking, thereby influencing our thoughts. What does this process mean for our relationships?

Consider how you speak about your partner, your kids, those you work with. Is your language peppered with complaints, criticism or negativity? This language will not only undermine your relationships, but it will also manipulate your own thoughts down a dark path.

Often, criticism is justified by a comment such as “I’m only stating the facts!” The truth is that our perspective is simply our perspective about the things that we choose to focus on. Partners can often become stuck in a cycle of what psychologists call ‘negative sentiment override’. Language becomes increasingly negative and the positive traits of one another are entirely overlooked. In focussing on the things we are not happy about, we overlook existing positivity. Our language becomes a narrative of discontent, creating a feedback loop that is sending a message of increasing discontentment to our brain.

Scientists are learning more about the effect of words on ourselves and others in the field of epigenetics, the science of turning genes on and off. Neuroscience has discovered that words can literally change our brains.

A single word has the power to influence the expression of genes that regulate physical and emotional stress. Positive words strengthen areas in the brain that promote cognitive functioning and stimulate the motivational centres in our brain.

Language is powerful but more often than not, words flow from our mouth without awareness. Our conversation runs on autopilot without thought to the impact we are having, not only on ourselves but on others. Our satisfaction with our lives can be greatly increased by tapping into the power of our spoken word. Mind your language! Aim to speak words of gratitude, positivity, encouragement. Not only will others benefit from this, but you will also reap the rewards.

Linda Gray
linda@relationshipsanctuary.com.au
0401 517 243


Image: news.standford.edu