Our winter meditation journey continues.
An inner journey to Self. Inner journeys are quite different to journeys into the external world.
The outer you, the face you show to the world – the success, the confidence and the material objects, validate our beliefs that somehow, if we tick all the right boxes, will assure our legitimacy as respectable, successful members of society. The inner you though, can be a mess, even if the outer you is shiny and self-assured. You can hide this inner face for a couple of decades, until often the chaos spills out into the outer you, usually in the form of a mental crisis, a physical drama or a haemorrhaging of relationships around you. Our society calls this a midlife crisis.

It’s not all gloomy, though. Many people, through innate natural intelligence, realise quite early in life that certain mental and emotional reactions are not working for them, and they often spend a lifetime changing, releasing, forgiving and cleaning up their inner selves. A good therapist, spiritual practice and supportive relationships also help. Now, meditation is one of those techniques that can short circuit this arduous journey of reconciling the inner and outer you and speed it up. Once you’ve learned to still that monkey mind, you eventually have to confront your inner truths and lessons and make a decision on how to deal with them. 

I liken meditation to spiritual decluttering. I’m a huge fan of physical decluttering on an energetic level, and an internal decluttering process can be quite profound. In meditative silence, you are confronted with lots of redundant emotions, memories and habits. Things like regrets: a lot of us go through life carrying a bagful of regrets. Things we did or things we didn’t do, regrets weigh us down like the clutter in our houses, and they also hold us back from trying new things or becoming better versions of ourselves. Unhealthy goals: we all need goals, but sometimes our goals are punitive, ridiculous and not even ours. Goals are influenced by your parents or your social class; if it’s not your goal, eventually, this goal will become very hollow and fuel a life crisis. Relationships: tricky. This one is about distancing yourself from friends or family who are not supportive and often quite toxic. Shame and guilt: forgiveness and self-love will rid you of these two poisonous emotions, untangling you from that memory or trauma and forgiveness either for self or seeking the forgiveness of others for past wrongdoing is hugely powerful. 

Don’t immediately replace old mental clutter with new clutter, even if they are positive thoughts. Initially, just enjoy the space. The space between the thoughts is where the magic happens. In stillness, focus on enjoying the freedom of living your life unburdened.

Margot Wagner
 Yoga Under the Bodhi Tree
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